Affirmations are all the rage these days. Have you tried them? I can understand why someone would hesitate to stand in front of a mirror and talk to themselves, but there is a lot of evidence in favor of giving it a shot. Affirmations allow you to consciously rewrite neural pathways with what you want to experience more of. Hearing things over and over helps you integrate those beliefs into your life. But not every affirmation is created equal.

If an affirmation feels untrue, it might not be helping. If you can’t get on board with something like, “I am a millionaire,” you’re most likely just reminding yourself how untrue it is. Try something that is a stretch but not too far from the truth like, “I am making more and more money every day.” We want to engrain these as beliefs, but if they feel like a lie, it will be much harder to do.

My best tip: pick something that resonates with you and that you can anchor in experience aka something that’s easy for you to believe. For example, I was told growing up that I was “spoiled rotten” (if you’re not from around here, this is not actually a slam – just a funny little saying when you get a gift or something you want). But the thing is, words are powerful and hearing something that literally has a negative connotation (even though that wasn’t the intention) can be harmful. Instead of using this memory to reinforce the belief that I’m selfish, I’ve chosen to rewrite the memory into a powerful affirmation: I always get what I want. Not in a superior way, but in a powerful, confident way. It’s reassuring to me because I’m able to use my experience to back up it’s truth and use the affirmation to support my dreams and goals. I’m sure that I’ll succeed because I believe that I always get what I want.

Other examples of this are Kathrin Zenkina’s affirmation, “My success is inevitable. I am always on the right path” and Amanda Frances’ affirmation, “ My work is of high service and worthy of massive compensation.” The more you feel the truth of the words to your core, the more in tune you are with the vibration of the words. This means that the affirmation is more powerful and will be more magnetic for you that other affirmations.

So the real trick is: make sure your affirmations are working for you. Not everything you find is going to work well for you. If it feels bad, drop it or rewrite it in a way that sounds more true to you. Stretch yourself on what you can believe, but not so far as to feel like you’re lying. And remember: the more you repeat it, the more you’ll believe it!